Like all relationship questions, there is no right or wrong answer. But if you’re reading this, it’s probably because you have considered it. The question, should you schedule sex with your partner can be answered with a yes, if you are dealing with these issues.

Conflicting schedules

Unfortunately, life gets pretty busy, pretty fast. While a 9 to 5 job used to be the norm, more and more people are working shift work or have fluctuating schedules. Furthermore, If you and your partner are often caught working on different schedules, it might be time to stop and compare your free time.

When you have conflicting schedules, it’s important to schedule time for the two of you, whether it includes sexual intimacy or not. Otherwise, it may be difficult to re-connect after a long absence. Be aware, that you might be too tired or not in the mood once your time comes around. That’s ok. The important thing is to spend that time together and enjoy each other’s company.


Having a child, or two, asleep in your bed can kill all levels of intimacy. Likewise, if you’re up all night trying to get a child back to sleep. Unfortunately, as great as children are, they take up a lot of time and energy. If you’re like most parents with small children and are finding it hard to have some adult time, then you might need to start scheduling it.

Find a time that works for both of you and commit to spending it with each other. You might need to invest in a babysitter or ask a relative to take the kids for a sleepover. A bit of distance from your kids is often needed to reignite the spark in your relationship.

Lack of sex

When’s the last time you had sex with your partner? For some couples, a long period of abstinence fits well with their natural sex drive. For others, it might be a bit too long. If you’re struggling to get back into a sexual rhythm, then it’s time to talk about it and try jumping back in. Schedule a time that works for both of you.

Sometimes the anticipation can work as a turn on, which will increase the likelihood of a fulfilling night. However, if you’re feeling too much pressure, back off a bit and commit to spending time together. Keep communicating with your partner about how you’re feeling. There’s a good chance it’s mutual.

Try, Try Again

If your scheduled intimate time wasn’t a success, don’t give up. Keep talking and keep finding ways to get back to each other. Sex is an integral part of a relationship. It might take a bit of effort, but once you’re able to re-connect, you’ll be so happy you did.

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